I am usually that ‘fat’ girl on stage when I perform. I am often referred to as such. Hell even I refer to myself as it at times. For me, fat is a three letter word that is nothing more than a descriptor. I do understand that for some people among us, that word is horrific to hear. Utterly understandable. Utterly. For me it hurts depending on the context and who is saying it. I also know and witnessed performers being berated for being ‘skinny’ and ‘skeletons’ onstage so lets not think size discrimination is only at the larger of us.
Audience members have spoken to me and often whilst I am sure they mean no offence by their comments (add alcohol and over excitement) but often if I wasnt so ‘ok’ with my size I could take the wrong way:
I am so glad that people are ok seeing you naked up on stage, it means they will be ok seeing me.
I love seeing big women like you not caring about their body not looking like other people.
Oh you are bigger than any of the other performers but its so nice to see fat people represented.
I kid not….
Ha. For those wondering I tend to fall somewhere between 12 and 14….UK. So er….ok.
With the recent furore over the cancelling of a performer due to her size and all the names coming out to support her, the weight issue is coming back up for discussion. Its an age old problem. Too big, too thin, too busty, no bust. BAH! Its appalling what has happened. People should only be cancelled if they are knob heads and/or dont impress the audience on stage. But again….whilst we claim we run the burlesque scene and self govern, it highlights just how much we dont. Money talks and sadly this club owner has decided to remove someone who doesnt fit his aesthetics and therefore the image of his club/show he is wanting to sell. He is looking to make more profit and less at the entertainment. For him a certain look equals money.
A stand needs to be taken.
The burlesque community are already taking a stand but shouldnt our audiences make one too? It is their money lining pockets, its their choice to come to a show that makes it successful. All I can see right now is burlesque darlings losing another show, another venue and another source of income as yet another person ruins it. With the burlesque market SATURATED with shows and some I hate to say, just not cutting the mustard why are we allowing a damn good show to die on its feet because some tosser has decided he can command the show. A show he is not producing even.
We can stand united as a burlesque front but we need our audiences to be there with us. To be outspoken directly to these idiots who can become dictators of entertainment based on size.
I have spent a lot of my career being called the fat girl or the big girl or the ‘real’ woman on stage. I am just a performer who may or may not be fat. Deal with it. My powerslides, my energy and my drive doesnt come from my size. Its comes from somewhere else. Burlesque should never be about the size its about the talent, the passion and the god damn audience love.
