It is inevitable that you will quit something especially when you are self employed. Especially when you work in a creative industry. The forums are awash with burlesque darlings asking if they should give up, quit or jack it in. Sometimes it is just time. Sometimes the bookings no longer come in. Often the pay doesn’t work out as good enough to cover the expenses let alone the true costs. Every so often you are just done the BS of the burlesque community. Lets not sugar coat this, it is not always a harmonious gathering of rhinestoned beauties. Whenever money is involved in a situation there will always be someone trying to take advantage or piss on someone else’s parade.
Dont believe the glamour.
There is not a loud enough speaker to get into everyone’s head space to say no one is living the most amazing life in burlesque. Dita herself will probably be having wobbly moments on her tour. Sure we would all love to be a pound behind her in the bank balance but lets not forget the effort, the time and passion it has taken to get any where she has. Not wishing to overlook the sacrifices she may have made, that woman has not done it easy but has made it appear effortless. Just like we do on stage.
Some people wont make it, some wont be a headliner at a grand show and some of us dont have to be in order to be a massive success as a performer. And sadly some of us need to quit. Not because we dont have a place, but because our time is better elsewhere. We have lost the spark or realised its not for us. So many hang on to things in the hope it will ignite again but infact it has the opposite effect.
It is ok to walk away
Like most things in life, you need to look after number 1 first. That can actually mean walking away from the stage and finding a new happy place. Burlesque is never the be all or end all of a life. It is so often just a stepping stone to another realm and avenue of work. Quitting is not forgetting. Quitting is changing direction to find a new path. Dont confuse it with defeat.
Defeat is not quitting. Defeat is never trying again.
For my fellow performers who are feeling their time with the stage is over, it is not. Only when you decide it is. Dont rely on someone telling you or gauging public opinion on whether you should. Look inside yourself for that answer. Only you know it.
If you are in two minds, actually start thinking what is making you feel you should quit? If you still love performing then stay with us. Do you find you are comparing yourself to others? Delete them, remove them, unfollow them. Dont look at them. I dont compare myself to others anymore. A while ago I did. I almost quit. Just as I started to slow down my bookings I got a flourish of more. The realisation I was being my own worst enemy by surrounding myself with images of mates performing all over the world whilst I spent Friday night in my house. I forgot the shows I had performed at, the big names I had worked with and the people I had met.
Self care. Self love.
Be true to yourself my darling. Burlesque isnt going anywhere but you may go beyond it, further and that is not a bad thing. Dont be afraid to do what is right for you x
